Final Conflict, The: The Omen III (1981)

More Satanic silliness as a permanently snarling Damien Thorn goes about preparing to topple the Almighty in one swift coup d'état.

By this stage of the series, Damien has become so powerful that he appears to be pulling the strings of the President of the United States himself. He is appointed American Ambassador to the United Kingdom because, according to ancient prophecy, Britain is "the Angel's Isle" where the Nazarene is due to be reborn—or some such Biblical claptrap. Not content with that, Damien also finds himself appointed head of the United Nations Youth Council (assuming such an organisation even exists), giving him the perfect platform from which to educate the world's youth about the virtues of a thoroughly godless existence.

Meanwhile the usual collection of babbling priests have once again "discovered the truth" and somehow stumble upon the legendary seven daggers—the only weapons capable of destroying the Antichrist. Nuclear weapons apparently wouldn't do the trick, but a handful of ancient knives will.

Naturally, the bumbling holy men spend most of the film being picked off one by one in a succession of Satanically orchestrated accidents. A decidedly friendly-looking Doberman doubles as Lucifer's messenger and, much like the infamous dog that supposedly spoke to Son of Sam, appears whenever somebody needs persuading to commit some suitably ungodly act.

The central premise this time is that Christ himself is about to be reborn somewhere in Britain. In order to eliminate this rather awkward obstacle to world domination, Damien orders the murder of every male child born on a particular day, ensuring that the Nazarene never gets the opportunity to grow up.

The body count mounts in increasingly ridiculous fashion. Children are booted to death, suffocated by overzealous priests, or dispatched by a variety of enthusiastically ludicrous methods as Damien's devoted followers attempt to clear the Devil's path to ultimate victory.

Along the way Damien develops something approaching romantic feelings for an ambitious television reporter who sees him less as the Antichrist than as a fast track to becoming Mrs. Thorn, future First Lady and international celebrity. She even attempts to use her rather dim-witted son to ingratiate herself with the suave ambassador, only to discover that her prospective husband spends much of his spare time lecturing statues of Christ, ranting endlessly about the Nazarene, snarling at invisible enemies and sleeping at the feet of enormous crucifixes. Not exactly ideal husband material.

Eventually the last surviving priest—sporting one of the thickest Italian accents in horror history—persuades the reporter to investigate Damien's mysterious birthmark. It takes her approximately three seconds to discover the dreaded Mark of the Beast and even less time to finish him off.

After three films of apocalyptic mayhem one might reasonably have expected the mighty Antichrist to put up rather more of a fight. Instead, all it takes is a quick jab with one of those trusty Biblical daggers and—poof!—Damien is gone and the world is saved.

What a feeble ending to what had begun as one of horror cinema's great franchises.

Unlike the superb original, this third instalment is neither frightening nor suspenseful, neither gruesome nor unintentionally hilarious. It simply plods aimlessly from one increasingly absurd plot development to the next, weighed down by a dreadful screenplay, uninspired direction, wooden performances and some remarkably unimpressive special effects.

The only truly memorable aspects of the film are its astonishing ineptitude and the magnificent accent of Father Di Carlo, who nearly steals the entire picture by himself.