Purani Kabar (1998)

Though Bollywood horror has never been a genre associated with refinement or artistic sophistication, one can usually depend upon it to provide a healthy supply of unintentional laughs if nothing else. Purani Kabar, unfortunately, struggles even to meet that modest standard.

The cast consists largely of obscure performers and aspiring starlets, with only Harish Patel likely to be familiar to most viewers. Patel plays Panday, a hunchback whose deformity appears to possess a life of its own, migrating mysteriously between various regions of his anatomy throughout the course of the film.

The plot revolves around a group of greedy schemers who discover they have each missed out on a massive lottery jackpot by a single digit. Unfortunately for them, an acquaintance named Vikram holds the winning ticket. Rather than congratulate him on his good fortune, they decide murder is the more practical solution.

Led by Panday, the gang ambushes Vikram while he is driving through a forest, kills him and buries the body in a shallow grave. Matters become complicated when a passer-by witnesses the crime and attempts to blackmail the killers. Demonstrating a remarkable inability to learn from experience, the gang simply murders him as well and deposits his corpse beside the first one.

This being a Bollywood horror film, death proves to be little more than a temporary inconvenience.

Before long Vikram rises from his grave as a vengeful zombie determined to punish those responsible for his demise. Much of the remaining action unfolds around a hotel where a film shoot is taking place, conveniently providing a steady stream of potential victims for the undead avenger.

Surprisingly, the zombie itself is reasonably effective. Unlike the endless parade of bargain-basement rubber-mask monsters that dominated horror cinema during this period, Vikram’s undead appearance is fairly convincing and occasionally even unsettling.

The trouble is that the creature scarcely appears.

Whenever the film threatens to become interesting, director K. I. Sheikh abruptly abandons the horror in favour of endless stretches of laboured comedy, pointless diversions and tedious filler. The actual horror content probably amounts to little more than fifteen minutes of screen time, with the remainder devoted largely to failed comic routines and aimless padding.

Harish Patel deserves some credit for throwing himself wholeheartedly into the role of Panday. His energetic performance is one of the few elements that displays any genuine commitment. Unfortunately, no amount of enthusiasm can compensate for a film so hopelessly out of balance.

The acting elsewhere is generally dreadful, though that hardly distinguishes Purani Kabar from many of its contemporaries. There are one or two songs that are surprisingly tolerable, although “Chooee Mooee” tests even the most charitable listener’s patience.

Ultimately, Purani Kabar is a film that repeatedly sabotages itself. It possesses one reasonably effective horror element in the form of its zombie, yet insists on burying him beneath mountains of excruciating comedy and interminable filler.

The result is a cheap, tedious and remarkably uninspired affair that manages to be more exhausting than frightening. Even committed devotees of Bollywood horror are likely to find themselves reaching repeatedly for the fast-forward button in a desperate attempt to reach the few moments where something vaguely interesting is actually happening.