Aakhri Goli (1977)
Cast: Yusuf Khan, Aasia, Mustafa Qureshi, Anita, Nasira
Director: Rehmat Ali
Synopsis: Crass potboiler in the mould of the notorious raunchy thriller Khatarnak.
Reviewed by: Omar Khan

Having admired the kinetic direction of Rehmat Ali in the blockbuster Khatarnak and then in Khaufnaak, and later entranced by the thunderous thighs and voluptuous beauty of Anita, we were in the throes of delight to discover that there was yet another loose follow-up to these potboilers in 1977’s Aakhri Goli.

The exceptionally talented Rehmat Ali directed this slice of mayhem, which included compulsory ingredients Anita and supervillain Mustafa Qureshi. Also starring in romantic leads were Aasia and Yusuf Khan, supported by Nayyar Sultana and Nasira. However, our drooling excitement turned to despair upon discovering that even the usually highly efficient pirates nor anyone else had made a video transfer. After scouring the video markets of Rawalpindi and Lahore, vendors informed us that this film was never transferred to video nor released on VCD either, nor had it appeared on national TV— in other words, a viewing was impossible. The gloomy scenario was a profoundly depressing setback, especially when we discovered some mouth-watering lobby cards of the film lying about in a Royal Park distributor’s office, which eventually led me to ask the fellow about the existence of the elusive Aakhri Goli. To cut a long story short, we have managed to have a transfer of the film made for ourselves exclusively from the censor board’s print, and therefore, have been able to review this film, which is an absolute rarity. The likelihood of it ever being screened again is remote indeed.

The film begins with a festivity as Nayyar Sultana’s six-year-old son marries a four-year-old bride. When the festivities reach frenzied levels of excitement, suddenly, the lights go out, and some dreadful bandits attack and loot the place. In the following scuffle and chaos, the two newlyweds tragically separated, and poor Nayyar Sultana left with her white stallion as her only companion. Years pass, and we discover that Nayyar’s son, Aslam, has grown into an incredibly handsome Yusuf Khan. He works in a crime syndicate whose modus operandi is to mesmerize people with a nightclub act, then suddenly turn the lights out and loot their audience. It’s a simple plan, but it works like a dream.

The syndicate’s leader is a one-eyed, patch-wearing, silver-haired Mustafa Qureshi, the same bandit who had robbed Nayyar’s house all those years ago when he wounded his eye. The other important syndicate member is Anita, whose stunning dance moves are responsible for intoxicating audiences, making them pliable before looting them wholesale. Anita also has a burning crush on Yusuf, but he does not have the time of day for her – oblivious to her gorgeous curves and smoldering beauty.

One fine day, multi-billionaire Aasia arrives at the nightclub wearing her most dazzling diamond necklace, which is promptly stolen by the syndicate, as is the norm. Yusuf throws a mini tantrum this time because Aasia’s sweetness and charm win him over. Aasia does not mind having her necklace stolen but is adamant that Yusuf and Anita perform at her upcoming birthday party and that he gives her guitar lessons. Anita burns up watching Yusuf turn from a crime kingpin to

Aakhri Goli a lovesick puppy when he is around Aasia. She vows to destroy Aasia, the thorn in her side.

Meanwhile, Boss Mustafa Q and Yusuf’s relationship deteriorates further when Yusuf refuses to hand over Aasia’s necklace to the gang’s stash of loot. Yusuf insists on hanging on to the chain and returning it to Aasia, for whom he has fallen head over heels in love. Meanwhile, Aasia pines for her guitar lessons, squirming in agony until she has her session at the hands of the dashing Yusuf. Anita teams up with Musty Q to get back at Yusuf, but Yusuf and Aasia have other plans.

Much mayhem follows, with Aasia abducted, Anita doing a double take, and Yusuf losing his memory. Still, it all comes full circle with everyone congregating at Nayyar’s old house, where the story began twenty years ago with the child marriage. Everyone is reunited, memories and smiles restored, while Mustafa Qureshi learns a lesson, he will never forget, and Anita vanishes into thin air.

Goli is an abysmal film with a dreadful, almost non-existent plot, zero production value, mediocre songs, and terrible acting— yet it does miraculously (due to these very shortcomings) retain a certain charm.

Perhaps the most impressive feature of the movie, other than its unique awfulness, is the brilliant background music score which contains long stretches of mesmerising concoctions of electric organs, a kitchen sink drum machine and various unidentifiable instruments. One memorable scene is where Yusuf Khan and Mustafa Qureshi shoot at each other, only for their bullets to collide in mid-air decades before The Matrix.

The veteran actress Nasira, performs remarkably as Miss Mary, a Christian Ayah who brings Aasia up and lectures her in the most unique, bizarre fusion of English and Punjabi. The film is a worthless piece of crap, and it is now not so difficult to understand precisely why it has never appeared on any form of video or screened on national TV. The film stinks to high heaven, and only tortured souls can derive any pleasure, satisfaction, or entertainment from something as hideously rotten as Aakhri Goli.