Khooni Shikanja (2000)

Sluttish siren Shefali struts into a spooky dungeon-like den inhabited by her chain-smoking father and aunt who, between puffs, enquire about the progress of her various schemes. The tart reports that everything is proceeding smoothly and that she has successfully duped wealthy dimwit Shanker into marrying her. Once the wedding is out of the way, the plan is for Shefali, her father and her aunt (assuming the latter pair have not succumbed to lung cancer by that point) to murder Shanker and his entire family before making off with their millions.

A simple enough plan by all accounts.

Unfortunately things soon go awry for the scheming trio as Shanker’s family are less than enthusiastic about welcoming a cheap floozy into their midst. A deadly counterplot is therefore hatched to derail Shefali’s ambitions before she can permanently sink her claws into the gullible heir.

Seasoned horror veteran Navin Nischal, still sporting a magnificent jet-black mane entirely untouched by the passage of time, conspires with the rest of the family and together they decide upon the only sensible course of action available.

They have their prospective daughter-in-law gang-raped, stabbed and thrown into a shallow grave.

Had these people been familiar with the basic rules of Bollywood horror, they would have realised that such behaviour seldom ends well.

Soon enough the murdered woman rises from the grave to wreak vengeance upon those who wronged her. Naturally she returns wearing the obligatory white sari, sporting a generous coating of soot, black smudges and what appears to be oatmeal, while periodically erupting into bouts of hysterical laughter.

Thus the devilish Shefali returns from beyond the grave and begins systematically reducing the Nischal clan through a series of increasingly bizarre accidents and murders. The question becomes whether anyone can stop the vengeful spirit of the gang-raped and brutally murdered ex-call girl before she wipes out the entire despicable family and completes her revenge.

There is also the small matter of the two mysterious chain-smoking figures who guide Shefali from the shadows throughout the proceedings. Despite their importance, we never really get a proper look at either of them.

Produced in 1999 and released during what was arguably Bollywood horror’s darkest era, Khooni Shikanja nevertheless manages to distinguish itself through a brisk pace and a surprisingly generous supply of imaginative, if frequently ridiculous, death scenes.

The acting is generally atrocious, which only adds to the film’s peculiar charm. Veteran horror stalwarts Navin Nischal and Kiran Kumar deliver polished performances that remind viewers exactly why they became such reliable fixtures of the genre. Raza Murad also turns up and proceeds to treat some truly astonishing dialogue with the utmost seriousness, creating yet another memorable performance in a career built upon them.

Several of the death scenes deserve special mention.

One sequence sees Shefali possessing a plastic doll which subsequently transforms into a foaming-mouthed vampire demon. Another features a buxom beauty being flattened beneath the bonnet of a car in a scene that must be witnessed to be fully appreciated. Elsewhere, a blithering, overweight grandfather suffers a wheezing fit before being kicked and sent tumbling down a staircase to his doom.

The staircase in question consists of approximately four steps.

It is difficult not to admire such commitment.

It is also slightly depressing to see Disco King Bappi Lahiri reduced to composing music for a production of this calibre, although his trademark disco excesses actually fit the material rather well.

Despite its glaring flaws, hideously stale storyline, kitchen-sink production values, risible acting and frequently embarrassing dialogue, the film moves along at a surprisingly merry pace and rarely allows the audience time to become bored. The absurd death scenes arrive thick and fast and the sheer energy of the proceedings helps compensate for many of its shortcomings.

Khooni Shikanja is unquestionably cheap, unquestionably trashy and unquestionably ridiculous.

It is also rather entertaining.